I’m a Bread Winner! or How I Pinched a Loaf

*ta, ta ta ta*  HEAR YE, HEAR YE!  All ye lords and ladies, gather around for a momentous tale of adventure, wit, skill, and kitchen appliances!  Hear ye, hear ye!  *ta, ta ta ta*

And now, without further ado, I present to the court your own Royal Highness’ first episode with her knight in shining armor, her Kitchen Aid Mixer!

I admit…my first interaction with the yet-unnamed Knight was risky and bold:  I planned to make two loaves of cinnamon bread in a machine I had never worked with before.  PLUS, I also wanted to bake 3 dozens cookies while the loaves were rising.  Pretty ambitious for a Kitchen Aid virgin.

I rolled my sleeves up, donned my apron, and set to work.  I was all a-twitter with excitement.  After carefully melting a butter/milk/sugar/salt mixture on the stove, I added that to some dissolved yeast, waiting patiently for me in my brand new mixing bowl.

I happen to love that picture, because it combines two of my loves this Christmas:  my new camera, and my new appliance.  So much love in one photo…I can’t bear it!

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Easy as Apple Pie

I’m easy….

I'll see you in the bedroom as soon as I can stand up.

No, no Uncle Lewis!  Put your pants back on!  I’m not THAT kind of easy.

Now, where was I?  Oh yes…I’m easy, meaning “easy to please,” especially when it comes to food.  Little Caesar’s Hot-N-Ready pizza, Quizno’s subs, McDonald’s milk shakes…I find gourmet pleasure in the simplest places.

The luck of the Irish starts with the Shamrock Shake.

Now, I’m not saying that I don’t have refined cuisine tastes, either.  I adore a smattering of sushi, a fine glass of Riesling, and a raspberry hazelnut cheesecake with Chambord for dessert.  I’ve had the good fortune to dine at Bobby Flay’s restaurant, savor thin crust flatbread from Italy, and cherish a well made risotto.  But, I’m easily satiated when it’s just me, myself and I at home.

I realized today, however, that my diet staples may evoke confusion amidst even the least finicky.  I didn’t ponder the oddities that fill my kitchen weekly until I had a friend over for lunch today, and attempted to offer him a favorite delicacy of mine.  Allow me to elaborate!

Item #1:  Freezer Pizza Because I a.) live alone, and b.) have a deep affinity for all things pizza, I wind up with an ample amount of leftovers.  Living in NYC for 2 years and being a college student for 8 has taught me one thing:  waste not, want not.  It became habitual for me to take leftovers, place them into Ziplock containers, and file them away in the confines of my freezer, ne’er to be seen for weeks, months, and sometimes years.  I guess you could say that I have the Mary Poppins Freezer:  I can stick my hand inside of it and literally pull out any dish from any cuisine…it’s a bottomless fridge of wonder.

I don't need a spoonful of sugar...just give me a bottle of wine.