Posts Tagged ‘Food’

Prompter’s Roulette: Ode to a Stale Cookie

Welcome back to another Plinky Prompts Thursday! I am your host, Aunt Bethany, and I’ll be—

What?!? We’ve re-named our traditional Thursday posts?  Why didn’t anyone tell me? God, this is embarrassing…of all the stupid, inconsiderate mistakes…

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Forgive me for the error, but it appears that we here at Miracle on 32nd Street will be labeling our Thursday prompt-centered posts as Prompter’s Roulette posts, a change from our usual Plinky Prompt Thursday posts.

As of late, I’ve been taking prompts from several different websites (not just Plinky), and it seemed erroneous to label my Thursday prompts as Plinky.  I’ll still be drawing from that website, but now I have the option to pick and choose between the prompts that land at my feet…kind of like Roulette.  I don’t know what I’m getting, but I’ll write on just about anything!

So, without further adoring Justin Bieber fans, I present to you my prompt for the week, straight from Mama Kat’s Pretty Much World Famous Writer’s Workshop:

2.) Write a love poem to a favorite food.


Ode to a Stale Cookie

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I remember life, flavor, zest

A presence of spirit, an offering of comfort

You, with your ruby red gems and your bittersweet memories,

You…you…gave up on me too soon


Life was a bowlful of cherries

(and eggs and sugar and flour and butter)

From humble beginnings, you molded yourself into a raw, doughy being,

not strong enough yet to stand


Decorating yourself with the darkest of chocolates and the richest of berries,

you separated yourself from the rest of the pack,

whittling and rounding your rough edges

into a sphere of endless possibility


You sat patiently, enduring heat and strife,

growing harder to the world as each minute passed

And, at 12 minutes old, you emerged from the fire

in a blaze of triumph and glory


You were volatile and hot, and scalded my hands

I waited for you with excitement and love

And when finally, you cooled to my sensitive touch,

you caressed my lips, and my joy became real


I was smitten with you, as you were with me

Every morning I indulged in some of your clones

But, as our courtship progressed, you grew distant and cold

And quickly our love began to fade


Your touch was so hard, your spirit was mute

Extra effort was needing to enjoy every bite

I gave you my all, I dunked you in milk,

until one day, you broke me, and chipped my front teeth


Now, I’m left with the memory of our love affair

I’ll never be whole, my heart is now changed

I’ll cry over you as you sit in the trash,

lamenting our—wait, is that cake?!?

Mama's Losin' It

Thanksgiving-Palooza: Part Three

Our third Thanksgiving-Palooza post involves a recap of the past two RACs I’ve done yesterday and today.  Aunt Bethany here, and I will still be serving as your host for this post, and for the upcoming fourth and final entry to our Thanksgiving-Palooza series.

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My Wednesday RAC was by no means anything spectacular.  It actually piggy-backed off of my Tuesday RAC, so, in many ways, it shouldn’t have counted.  Still, it’s an action I wouldn’t normally have done, so, it counts! RACs are kind of like horse shoes and hand grenades:  even if you’re close, it counts!

As I was picking up a Little Caesar’s Hot-N-Ready pizza on Wednesday, I was met by a rather pleasant and amiable cashier, who looked liked he had just faced a rather difficult rush of lunch orders.  Still, he approached the counter refreshed and with a smile on his face.  In fact, he even took the time mid-transaction to ask me how I was, a question which usually is placed at the front of conversation and without much thought.  “How are you today?” has become as normal as just saying “Hello” to someone…you do it without thinking, but just how much do you really wish to know how someone is?

So, hearing this question mid-conversation kind of threw me, in a good way.  I think I was so surprised to hear that come out of his mouth that I almost didn’t know how to respond.  I was able, however, to come up with something, because my hands eventually found their way to my wallet and handed $6.95 to the cashier.  “How are you?” goes” at the BEGINNING of the conversation, goddamnit!  Cannot compute, cannot compute, cannot compute…

I was just about to pick up my steaming box of goodness when I glanced down on the counter to spy a mostly empty tip jar staring back at me…

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How can you say “no” to eyes like that?

Really, how CAN you?

Thanksgiving-Palooza!

Hello all, and welcome to the first annual…

Thanksgiving-Palooza!

echo *PALOOZA PALOOZA PALOOZA PALOOZA* echo

razy turkey

I am Aunt Bethany, and I will be your host for our day of festivities…

bethanyA glimpse of Aunt Bethany…

Let’s get down to business!  Our first post for Turkey Day will feature a topic which is on everyone’s mind.

Uncle LewisSEX?!?

Aunt Bethany: No, Uncle Lewis!  Put your hands in the air and back away from the bourbon!

Sorry, folks….you’ll have to excuse him.  He doesn’t get out much, and unfortunately, today he forgot to take his medication.  He says it doesn’t mix well with the liquor, and I really don’t want to see what he acts like hyped up on bourbon and Viagra….I mean, Lipitor….

Now, back to what today’s really about (besides all those feel-good, warm your heart ideals like gratitude, thankfulness, and generosity…):

FOOD!

Serve the first course!

I’ll take “S Words” for $800…

And now, ladies and gentlemen, here is your Final Jeopardy answer:

This RAC, costing only $5.55, counts as both a good deed for the day AND as a meal for the RAC’er.

Your answers, please!

Ferabeth wrote:

texas

“Texas”….with a dollar sign…interesting, but not correct.  Contestant #2,   The Edmonton Tourist, wrote:Betty

Although Mrs. White is a bright spot in everyone’s day, she is NOT the correct answer.  Our last hope….Contestant #3, SisterMerryHellish writes…

pizza

Pizza?!?  Although NOT the exact answer we were looking for—judges, am I allowed to?—yes!  We can accept pizza as the correct answer!  YOU WIN!

jeopardy

SisterMerryHellish, as our reigning champion, you get to pocket the $9.74 you earned this game, which adds to your total—wait, actually—your Round 2 score was negative, so actually, you owe us $42.57….

Also, as winner, you get to hear about Aunt Bethany’s RAC for the day!  Aren’t you a lucky bum!

Advance to the winner’s circle…

Tossing My Cookies

Over the past two weeks, it has become very clear to me that many of my RACs are dominated by food:  pumpkin cookies, chocolate covered cherries, coffee, frappes, Sam Adams beer, and Chips Ahoy cookies.  I noted in one of my posts that this is certainly not a bad thing…food has an odd and magical way of bringing people together.  Friends and family members gather around tables adorned with turkey, cranberry sauce, stuffing, gravy, potatoes and pumpkin pie every November, partaking in kin, companionship, and joy.  You’d be hard pressed to find one person at these parties who is irritated by the wonderful dishes presented before them.

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Take it from someone who has a crazy family..when your mouths are full, you can’t throw chairs, emit steam from your ears, or fight until the meal is done!

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It’s pretty much accepted that yes, food can and will bring people together, even if you have to break out the Chocolate Peanut Butter Cheesecake when Papa Phil’s hearing aid goes on the fritz and Gram starts spewing a mouthful of delicious obscenities (true story).  Butcan food bring complete strangers together?

Well, can it?…

“A miniature sleigh, and 12 tiny winter beers…”

Nothing says “Merry Christmas” like buying your first pack of Sam Adams Winter Brews…

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(Note: it’s sometimes good to do an RAC for yourself, time and again…)

It’s amazing how many RACs you can accomplish through the purchase/creation of food and/or drink.  One would think merely giving food is a trivial matter…something done for funerals, birthdays, holidays…how on earth could a plate of brownies change someone’s day?

Think about it, though.  Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, pause for a moment.  I have a special surprise for you…

pie

Pumpkin cheesecake, replete with whipped topping, chopped walnuts, and gooey caramel drizzle.  500 of the best calories you’ll spend all day.  Brought to you unannounced, and, it’s all…for…you…every last bite.

Even if you don’t like pumpkin, or cheesecake…or dessert, even, you’d probably still be pleased that somebody unexpectedly brought you a decadent treat for your mere enjoyment.  Even if you were presented with baked goods that were more like bricks than brownies, you’d graciously accept them, thank the sender, and probably share a laugh later about losing 3 teeth to a charred piece of batter.

The point is:  food brings us together. Especially during the holiday season.  Is there any other time of year that has such a great outpouring of cookies, pies, tarts, breads, and fruitcakes?  Dentist offices boast candy dishes with red and green M&Ms, candy canes are distributed freely everywhere, and you can find pumpkin in just about any café or restaurant menu.

Now, for your enjoyment, a holiday syllogism:

  • Food/drink brings us together
  • Being together makes us happy
  • Alcohol is a drink
  • THEREFORE….alcohol makes us happy!

And my personal conclusion…

  • Sam Adams is the best beer
  • Beer is alcohol
  • Sam Adams makes me the most happy!

I was out celebrating a close friend’s 40th birthday last night (and, as it happened, the premiere of Sam Adam’s Winter Ale).  As we stepped up to the bar to order drinks, I suddenly knew I had another RAC to accomplish: I would buy a round of drinks for my friends, an act I don’t normally think of doing, having sold most of my soul to 2 loan companies for grad school.

3 Sam Adams and 1 Labatt Blue later, I plunked my money down on the counter…and you know what?  The universe smiled back!  1/2 off all libations from 9-11PM! Give a little love (or, in this case, beer) and you’ll get it back!

RAC #5:  Buy a round of drinks for friends.

Result: Liquid courage, a night of laughter, slight buzz